Monday, May 25, 2009

I only had him YESTERDAY.......

When you give birth, you have no idea about what is ahead of you in this life. The longing for that child and the overwhelming love hits you like a load of bricks. I never knew that love could go so deep. You go through all the stages with your child. You worry and cry for them. You laugh with them and at times laugh at them and what they say. At each step in their life and yours is something new for both of you.

Then the day arrives when all your hard work as mother comes to the final steps. When they graduate from college, which you have worked so hard to prepare them for.
I remember when he was 1 year old we dedicated him at Baby Dedication Sunday at our church in Santa Cruz. For Protestants it is like a christening where you acknowledge that this gift you have been given from God is just passing through your hands and that God has a purpose for this child's life and that you will raise him to know God. Joe and I walked up with the other new parents holding their little ones that Sunday except all the parents where holding newborns, the oldest being 3 months old and we stood there holding our bigger than his age 1 year old who was carrying a piece of lace in his chubby hands. I noticed that the other parents all had family members in the crowd that were taking pictures and waving but we where alone, just the 3 of us. It's always been that way.

I knew then that God had made this little man I held in my arms for some sweet reason. Maybe it was for future grandchildren to cuddle and love or it was to be a doctor or a teacher that would help others. We had no idea. But every night I have prayed for God's will in my child's life. That baby dedication was 21 years ago. So today is the day that I realized as a mother that I have one more big event to challenge me as a parent. Something that I never envisioned. Last Saturday Matt received his degree in Mathematics and today, on Memorial Day, I watched my only child leave for boot camp to become a United States Marine.

The joy on his face made me realize that this is what God had made him for. After boot camp he will spend 2 years at the Defense Language Institute in Monterey to become a linguist and from then on, who knows?

So he won't be the dentist down the street or sit in an office crunching numbers and making tons of $$$$$ . But he will be doing what God has gifted him for. So my prayers have been answered, just not in the way I wanted God to answer me. God has bigger plans than a mommy can imagine. I do have tears today but they are tears of deep pride and thanksgiving. I know my child is doing what he was made to do.

My blog is a little heavy today but filled with great pride.Who knows what the future will hold for this man and his mom, but just maybe someday we might have a Bula in the White House.

I was woundering if they have ever thought about painting it yellow?
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